Nexus Chapter 26: Epilogue
Oh, now that was a picture. Clothed in nothing but silk boxers that stretched fetchingly across his delectable rump, Xander lay sprawled on his belly on their bed, reading a manual on the care and cleaning of iron weaponry. Angel stood in fond contemplation for a moment, then bounded into the room and onto the bed with exuberant good humor, planting a loud smacking kiss on the center of the young man´s back. Grinning, Xander rolled over to gaze up at his vampire. Angel´s smile widened as he contemplated Xander´s bare abdomen. The first few weeks after Xander came to L.A., he had been tense and unhappy, and had lost so much weight that he looked wiry. Cordelia had commented appreciatively on his leaness, but Angel knew that Xander´s slenderness stemmed from unhappiness, and it had increased Angel´s own misery.
Now Xander´s new contentment was evident in the bulk of his muscles and the very slight rounding of his belly, and Angel loved it. His eyes gleaming, the vampire bent and nuzzled the warm skin, then nibbled it lightly, tickling deliberately until Xander´s rich laughter rang out. With a final appreciative kiss on the sweet curve, he dropped back onto the bed and rolled Xander over onto him.
The mortal crossed his forearms across the vampire´s broad chest and propped his chin on them. “Gee, Mr. Sunshine, you´re awfully happy about something. Care to share?”
“I just talked to Buffy on the phone.”
“Yeah? How´s everything in the old hometown?”Xander´s light tone didn´t fool Angel; he had seen the slight shadow, quickly suppressed, that passed through Xander´s expression. Angel sighed inwardly. His boy was always going to be a little insecure, it seemed. At least, if all went well, he would soon cease to see Buffy as a potential rival for Angel´s affection.
“Situation normal in Sunnydale. She asked about you, of course.”
“Did you tell her I was well fed and well fucked?”He rotated his hips suggestively, smirking as he felt Angel´s anatomy beginning to sit up and take notice.
Angel play–growled and gripped Xander´s hips, giving them a squeeze as he arched his pelvis up to meet Xander´s slow grind.
“Not in so many words.”
“But you got the idea across, huh?”Xander was starting to pant a little.
“Actually, I told her that you were the most important thing in my universe and I would do anything to protect you and make you happy.”The vampire´s tone was suddenly grave, and he reached up and stroked the younger man´s cheek with aching tenderness.
Xander stopped wriggling, his attention fully caught by the emotion in his mate´s voice.
“Wow.”He turned his head to rub his cheek against Angel´s smooth chest. His own voice was soft and a little tremulous. “What else did you tell her?”
“Well!”Angel carded Xander´s dark hair gently, his other hand lazily stroking the mortal´s broad back, “That´s what put me in such a good mood. I kind of hope that I did her a favor.”
Xander lifted his head to meet his lover´s eyes. “How so?”
“I told her how glad I was that I finally decided to listen to my heart instead of my stupid fears. I told her it was the smartest thing I ever did, and that it would have been tragic if I had let my stupid stubbornness cheat me out of a really good thing.”He gave Xander a wry look. “I want to Buffy to be as happy as we are, no matter how bizarre her heart´s desire might happen to be.”With that, he waited patiently as Xander´s expression progressed predictably from puzzled to suspicious to horrified to outraged as he finally caught on.
“Hey! Wonder if Willow could modify that resoulment spell to get your brain back, because, unless I misunderstand your meaning, you´ve obviously LOST IT!”Propping himself up on one elbow, Xander rapped rather sharply with his knuckles on his love´s forehead. “HELLO? Angel´s brain? Have you packed up and moved away, or are you just MALFUNCTIONING?!?”
Laughing, the vampire caught Xander´s wrists, hooked a leg around his and flipped them both over, then grinned down at his sputtering mate. “Look, Xan, I know that you´ve traditionally been opposed to the whole ´Buffy and Spike´ idea, but, considering that your main objection has always been that he was a vampire, don´t you think that you´re kind of in a weak position for that argument?”There was a suggestive tone to his pronunciation of the word “position,” and, as he spoke, he nudged Xander´s knees apart so he could settle himself between them.
Admitting defeat, Xander snapped his mouth shut and pouted sulkily, giving Angel an opportunity for some mutually enjoyable coaxing. Soon, Xander was breathing hard and arching up against his insistent lover, but he did manage to have the last word on the topic.
“We are SO not double–dating with them!”
In Sunnydale, Buffy stood on the back porch of her home and stared sightlessly at the lengthening afternoon. She was doing Deep Thinking. All in all, she´d rather be dismembering something with an axe, but there were some things that just couldn´t be avoided: Tax season, annual pelvic exams, scheduled auto maintenance, and, occasionally, Deep Thinking.
After a few moments of knitted brow, she was ready to admit to herself that the slight unhappiness she felt over Angel´s obvious joy with Xander was the result of less than noble reactions to the situation. Some girly part of her kind of enjoyed being half of a doomed romance, and the least mature of the voices in her head was indignant that he would dare be the first one to move on, and let´s not even get into the fact that there were now a few questions about just how “in it” he had been in the first place. Plus, he´d moved on with someone who was supposed to be a little bit in love with her for life. It was like getting left out of the games at her own birthday party.
But, Mature Buffy acknowledged, taking a seat on the top step and gazing out of the diminishing day, the only true heart pang she´d had about Xander and Angel mostly had to do with nostalgia. Change was painful, on or off the Hellmouth, and there was a sweetness about her memories of her high school years. Willow and Xander, innocent of the pain that would come later, Mom at home (that still hurt, and always would, she supposed,) Giles at the library, and mysterious, tragic Angel, always lurking adoringly and being every girl´s romantic dream.
Even the work had been exciting then; her mind played a little montage of the various adventures of her early Sunnydale years, halting abruptly on a vivid vision of a hyperactive Master Vampire with the effrontery to attack the school on parent–teacher night. With Angel´s words ringing in her ears, the picture of Spike in her mind, she took a deep breath and waited as everything fell into place with an almost audible series of thuds.
Looking up, she noted that the last gold was gone from the sky and dusk was falling fast. Dark plus Call to Buffy from Angel equals!Before the thought was finished, she slid from the middle of the broad steps to one side and waited. She didn´t have long; three seconds at most and the kitchen door banged open and a swirl of black crested with silvery white flew out and bounded past her down the steps with an airy “Evenin´, Pet.”
Forget it, Buster. Buffy was uncomfortably aware of not having her ducks in a row for this particular conversation, but instincts screamed ´don´t let vampire out of sight,´ and instincts were much faster than reason.
“OI! Have a care for the haberdashery!” Spike took advantage of vamp agility to keep from falling on his ass then twisted to look back over his shoulder at the tiny but powerful fist that had wound itself in the leather of his duster and abruptly checked his forward momentum. “Bloody hell, Slayer, you could have just said ´wait a minute,´ y´know.”
“Sorry.”
Still half turned away, head tilted and one eyebrow up, Spike regarded Buffy, noting the pensive look on her face. He sighed inwardly. He´d tried hard not to hear the conversation between the Slayer and his idiot of a sire, but he´d picked up enough to be aware that there´d been a lot of worshipping of the Great God Xander and praising domestic bliss, and he´d hoped to spend the evening at the closest rundown bar drinking copiously and thereby avoiding the sight of Buffy moping over her lost love.
Apparently, though, Spike was being called upon to be confidante to a wounded Slayer, and, much as it hurt, he knew he´d do it, and do it right. Never mind that it bloody well half–killed him.
She never had really talked it out, all those revelations about Xander and Angelus. It was inevitable, he supposed. Had to be dealt with sooner or later. Hurting for her in spite of himself, he settled next to her on the top step and waited for her to break her silence.
Meanwhile, Buffy was distracted by the rush of heat she´d felt when he´d given her That Look, and the dawning awareness that, her decision made and feelings acknowledged, she no longer had to deny it. Seeing the softening of her expression, Spike´s wary look gave way to confusion, then something like shock when she spoke.
“I love you.”
Gobsmacked, Spike just stared at her while hope uncoiled in him like a serpent, and he hurried to stomp on it before it came up and bit him in the ass.
“´Course you do, Luv. And we all love you.”
A little shake of her head. “No, I love YOU.”
Spike took a deep breath and lit a cigarette, hands shaking, and looked off into the deepening twilight. “Finally giving up on Peaches and having a good look at the first runner–up then?”His voice was soft, toneless.
Her voice was just as soft. “Nah. I´m just a little slow on the uptake, is all.”
A beat of silence, then he shot up off the steps and stood for a moment on the lawn looking out on the rising moon, then whirled, scowling at her and flinging the cigarette aside. “Bloody, buggering, sodding hell! Are you telling me that, after all this time, that´s it? Just, ´I love you, Spike´ and on about our business?” he blustered, still trying to resist the Snake of Hope, which didn´t look like dying anytime soon. His voice lowered to a mutter, and he dropped back down on the step next to her. “Talk about your anti–climax.”
She sidled over a couple of inches and leaned against him, suddenly gone all kittenish and soft. “Want climax? I´ll give you climax!”
Oh,Gods, oh please oh please oh please! “So, what´s this mean, then?”He lifted a cautious arm and wrapped it experimentally around her shoulders, nearly dying (again) when she sighed and snuggled into the embrace.
“Means we´ve got some work to do.”
“Oh, yeah? What kind of work?”Spike covered his insecurity with the Patented Spike Leer, the tip of his tongue darting out to touch his top lip. Buffy gave a shaky giggle and let herself luxuriate in the wave of arousal that rushed through her. Spike scented her warmth, and let it start to be real.
“We can hang blackout curtains in my room, or we can move my bed—our bed—to the basement. Your choice.”
Spike flopped backwards onto the porch floor and draped his arm over his eyes. “Sweet Jesus on the freeway. She means it.”
Buffy dropped down next to him on one elbow and tugged his arm away from his face, draping it around her shoulders again. “Yep.”
“So, now we´re a couple?”
“Yep.”
“An item?”
“Absolutely.”
“A pair?”
“You bet.”
“Boyfriend/girlfriend?”His look was still skeptical, but he had begun to rub her back in tiny circles.
“Totally.”
“An´ I get to touch you whenever I want?” The stroking hand flattened possessively across her shoulders and she let herself be drawn closer.
She grinned at him, giddy. “Within reason.”
“Right. Bein´ discreet, an´ all.”
She frowned, puzzled, then laughed. “Actually, I meant no feeling me up while I´m in the middle of killing something.”She nuzzled his neck, then smiled when he trembled in reaction. “Discreet, nothin´. Who´s to care? Willow and Dawn love you!” Her eyes softened at the flash of pleasure that crossed his face at that, “and Xander might bitch and moan, but what´s he´s going to say?”
Spike, finally really beginning to believe, cuddled his Slayer a little closer and chuckled. “And if the whelp isn´t happy, then that´s Peaches´ lookout, init?”
Buffy giggled (totally undistracted by mention of Angel, Spike noted happily), nipped at his ear lightly, then pulled away slightly. “Completely. And he might be in for a tiny bit of trouble with the mate, seeing as he´s actually promoting this match.”
Distracted by the feel of those little white teeth on his sensitive ear, Spike was a little slow to get her meaning. “Peaches is? The hell you say!”
She nodded her head. “When I was on the phone with him, he kept making these comments about how glad he was that he hadn´t let his stubbornness keep him from the one thing he wanted most. Subtle, he´s not.”
Spike raised one skeptical, scarred brow, and Buffy wanted to lick it.
“Are you SURE this is what he meant, pet?”
“Very sure..”Giving in to temptation, she pressed a light kiss to that irresistible scar, then drew back, suddenly uncertain. “I guess I´m taking things for granted. I didn´t ask you what YOU want!”
Reminded that sometimes his Sire wasn´t so bad, and making a mental note not to run him through with hot pokers in future, Spike studied his Slayer´s face for reassurance. Finding it, his voice was a whisper. “Know what I want?”He kept looking in her eyes, reading her love there. “What, baby?”The endearment went through him like an electrical shock, and his voice was tight with emotion.
“I want to know what it´s like to make love to you when you´re not pretending you don´t care for me.”
“Whenever you want. However you want.”She was as sweet and grave as a virgin at prayers, and Spike felt like his old, cold heart would burst. Buffy squealed, finding herself flying as her vampire–speed–having suitor snatched her up into his arms and sprang to his feet in one smooth motion.
“Get the door, will you, there´s a love.”Spike´s tone was light, but his voice was thick with emotion. Breathless, Buffy turned the doorknob then clung to her very own vampire as he loped across the threshold into the kitchen and kicked the door shut behind him.
“Evenin´, Bit.”
Dawn stood frozen in the act of shrugging into her jacket to go out. “Uh! Hi, there?”
Suddenly shy, Buffy buried her face in Spike´s neck as he spoke. “Off on a date then? That´s good. Just going to take Big Sis here upstairs and give her a good seein´ to, alright?”
With that, Spike crossed the kitchen and started up the stairs, chuckling at Dawn´s squeal. “Oh, gross, Spike! TMI!”
Tardily reminded of her sisterly duties, Buffy lifted her head and hollered over Spike´s shoulder. “Be back by midnight, Dawn!”
“Don´t wait up!”There was laughter in Dawn´s suggestive tone, implying a blessing. Buffy sighed happily and nestled into Spike´s arms.
Once in Buffy´s bedroom, Spike laid his precious armload down and lit the candles beside the bed before seating himself on the edge of the mattress and looking at her in the candlelight. Just looking. His. She reached for him, starting to ease the duster off his shoulders, but he caught her hands, kissed each one, then laid them carefully down by her sides. When he spoke, his voice was hoarse with emotion. “No. Let me.”
“Spike!”
“No, please, justlet me!”
She understood. She had put limits on him during their destructive affair a few years ago. No act was too kinky, but no lover–like gentleness, no just looking. She was punishing herself at the time, she didn´t deserve tenderness, and couldn´t have born it. And too selfish to care that she was punishing him too.
Now she sighed and relaxed, giving herself over to his desires. Passive, because that´s what he wanted, she let him undress her slowly. When she was completely naked, he stood and looked down at her. Still in his black leather, every line screaming coiled tension, his eyes shadowed so that she couldn´t see his expression. For a moment, he was the Big Bad again, and she was naked and defenseless, and she moved her arms to cover herself. Then the candle flames wavered and the shadows rearranged themselves, and she could see the vulnerable longing and love in his blue, blue eyes, and she opened to him, reaching for him.
He came to her then, easing himself down on top of her, and she felt a shudder go through him as she embraced him, naked arms and legs wrapping around his fully clothed form, holding him close, feeling him tremble. He buried his face in her neck and breathed her in, murmuring brokenly into the soft skin of her neck.
Spike lay at complete peace for the first time in years, awash with contentment, a slumbering Buffy curled trustingly against him, her blonde head pillowed on his chest. Even though he was usually up and about his business this time of night, sleep called to him. As it turned out, suddenly achieving one´s heart´s desire was an exhausting business, particularly when one´s heart´s desire happened to be an enthusiastic, supernaturally strong helluva shag.
They´d made up for a lot of lost time that evening, their time in bed interrupted only, at the Slayer´s insistence, by an initially painful but unbelievable tender and ultimately redemptive episode on the bathroom floor; finally entering into the spirit of her intention, he´d made love to her on the cold tiles until she came and came again, whimpering his name. Then they´d whispered words of love to one another until the memory of a desperate demon trying to take love by force was nothing but a fading shadow.
Sleep called to him, and he fought it, feeling the beginning of a slight irritation. That´s it, I´ll kill her if! Keys in the lock, and he heard the front door open then close, then the sounds of the deadbolt sliding home just as the digital clock by the bed flashed 12:01. Light footsteps mounted the stairs and hesitated by the bedroom door. He laid a light hand over Buffy´s ear and called softly “Cuttin´ it close, Li´l Bit.”
A soft reply in a voice full of amused affection. “´Night, Spike. Sleep well.”
He did, but not right away. He forced himself to lay awake for another 15 minutes or so, enjoying his Slayer´s warm sleeping body against his, and waiting. When another key in the lock signaled Red´s return, he let his eyes drift closed.
It was weirdly right, this. The Scoobies, those insanely courageous demon–fighting teenagers of years ago, had found shelter beneath two roofs, each under the powerful protection of one of the two remaining Masters of the House of Aurelius. An unforeseeable ending, but seemingly fated.
In the nighttime quiet of the house on Revello Drive, a drowsy vampire heard Dawn tapping urgently at Willow´s bedroom door, bursting with her secret. The last thing that Spike heard as he drifted into sated slumber was Willow´s muffled squeal of pleasure at Bit´s news. They really did love him then, his little family of women. And he would keep them safe. Smiling, the vampire slept.
One hundred and fifty miles away, another vampire unknowingly mirrored his childe´s ritual, holding his sleeping beloved against his heart while demon and soul together kept vigil, tracking the whereabouts of each member of his strange little family, counting them off as Fred, then Gunn, then Cordelia, then Lorne, and finally Wesley retired into their respective bed chambers. When each was safely in for the night, Angelus tightened his embrace around his warm, sweet boy, and let sleep take him.
The End
