Shattered

Giles threw the paper upon the table with a sigh. "Another one, this time in the park on the north side of town!"

Xander pulled the paper to him as he put his drink down. "Gross!"

"Well yes, quite. The local authorities are attributing it to wild animals, perhaps even wolves." Giles said as he walked around the table to his seat.

"But you don´t think so." Xander said, still looking at the paper. His free hand reached out and found the box of donuts on the table. He unerringly found the jelly donut of his choice and bit into it, all without ever looking away from the paper.

"I´m not sure what to think. Considering the activity around the Hellmouth since Buffy died I think it is unlikely." Giles sipped at his tea with a sigh. With a small clatter, he set the cup back onto the saucer. He removed his glasses and rubbed his eyes.

Willow frowned. "I miss Dawnie."

"I´m sure she is fine with her father. At least one can hope." Giles matched her frown. Putting his glasses back on, he blinked tiredly.

"Well, what kind of demon would," Tara gestured at the paper, her face tinged green, "eat people like that?"

"In that manner? Well, actually the list is a lot smaller than one would think. For instance, vampires usually keep their prey relatively intact...unless...playing with them." He glanced at the grinning vampire leaning against the counter.

"Ah, the good old days!" Spike´s eyes twinkled in the dimmed light, betraying the image that he had not been paying attention.

Giles cast an annoyed look back before turning back to the others. "But even then, there isn´t much in the way of...shredding. They just aren´t...equipped for that type of damage. Though I have little doubt one could if they chose to. Werewolves could..."

"Oz is in Nevada, I got a post card from him!" Willow said hurriedly.

Giles smiled gently. "Oz has learned much in the last few years. In fact, I wish he were here. If it is a werewolf, he could help us track it."

Giles took in a deep breath. "I really couldn´t say what could have done this without further study."

"Maybe Fangless could, you know, check out the scene?" Xander gestured at the vampire that was now flipping idly through a magazine.

"OR! Fangless could just bugger off to home and leave you lot to deal with it yourself!" Spike stood up and grabbed his long black duster that had been lying beside him on the counter.

"OR! Xander could apologize for calling you Fangless, again, and we can all try being civil!" Giles sipped some more tea. "Really Xander, I have no idea why you are acting so, persnickety today."

"Persnickety, Giles? Only you would use the word persnickety in a sentence!" Xander rolled his eyes.

Willow wrinkled her nose, "Just ignore him, Giles. He´s in a mood. He gets like that once in a while. Spike, you should ignore him too."

Xander rolled his eyes again. "I am SO sorry that you are fangless Spike!"

Giles peered at Xander over the rims of his glasses. "That wasn´t what I meant Xander and I do believe you know it!"

Xander´s eyes rolled for a third time in as many minutes. "Sorry...Spike."

"Will that do for your, delicate, sensibilities?" Giles asked dryly as Spike glared at Xander.

Spike stared at Xander for a minute longer. "I suppose. And I suppose I could have a look–see. S´not like I´ve got anything better to do at the moment."

Spike edged around the table. "Dark enough now...Want to come along?"

"Xander, go with him if you would, please. There have been a rash of muggings lately and it wouldn´t do for him to fall prey." Giles said without turning. "Not that I think they would do serious damage of course, but they have tended to shy away from groups of any sort."

Xander stood up. "No problem. Come on!"

Xander threw the front door open with enough force to crack the wood.

"You ARE in a bit of a mood!" Spike muttered as he followed.

"You don´t know the half of it!" Xander said darkly.

The trip to the park was made in relative silence, broken only by the sound of crickets and the quieter noise of their steps upon the pavement. Spike pulled his duster closer to his body despite the warmth of the evening while Xander began to unbutton the top of his shirt. The tip of Spike´s cigarette glowed in the dark, growing brighter as he inhaled, then dimming again. The stars in the sky twinkled down upon them peeking around clouds while a haze haloed the moon.

"Could be rain soon." Spike commented quietly.

Xander grunted.

As they got closer, the sounds of scurrying in the under brush became more distinct. Snuffling and snorting, followed by a sound of surprise and retreat. The leaves around them shook and rustled before stilling.

"What the hell are those?" Xander asked.

"Scavengers. No threat. They smell blood, looking for a quick meal." Spike ducked under a strip of bright yellow tape. "Blood is about all you can smell though."

"Nothing else?" Xander asked as he watched Spike wander around the crime scene. Chalk marks stood out in stark relief to the dark ground. Black spots decorated the area in a pattern that reminded him of those abstract paintings that Willow had dragged him to see when they were still in high school. He felt his stomach turn a little as the intelligent part of his brain informed him that it was dried blood.

Spike drew in an unnecessary breath. "I think it may have been too long, mate. All I smell is blood for the most part. I smell you of course, your cologne leaves much to be desired, and I smell something vague, animalistic. I don´t know what it is exactly; could be one of the scavengers that have come sniffing around. I don´t think it is our killer though. Actually looks like an animal DID do this."

"How do you know?"

"Don´t KNOW exactly, but there is a lot of scratching around here." Spike pointed to the ground. "Like something digging at the meat with its front claws or something...and I can see where the police have marked things off. Looks like this poor git was run down, like wolves do."

"Could it have been a werewolf?" Xander crossed his arms and began to bite on his thumbnail.

"Don´t think so. They tear people up but rarely actually eat them. This thing made a meal. See that white over there near that bush? That is bone, and it has been bitten into, crushed actually. Powerful jaws. Surprised they missed that bit." Spike commented as he pulled the fragment out from under the bush. He lifted it to his nose. "Bloody hell, can´t smell ANYTHING over your cologne!"

"Willow? Do you have any idea what could be wrong with Xander?" Giles asked as he closed the book in front of him. He stood up and placed it back on the shelf before pulling down several more books.

"I think he´s just under a lot of pressure." Willow said with a sigh. "It´s hard, you know. He hasn´t been out on his own for long. Not really. And he just has all this...STUFF on his mind!"

Tara nodded absently. "He´s been off kilter all week. Kind of snappish."

"He gets like that, you know, when he´s stressed." Willow said. "He is very stressed right now."

"What exactly is he stressing about? Perhaps we could help?" Giles asked as he pulled out another book and opened it.

Willow bit her lip and looked around the room. The blinds had been pulled and the ´Closed´ sign hung in the door. The florescent ´Open´ sign was long since turned off and the cash register had been covered. Things that normally lay on the counter to tempt customers had been put away and the accounting books were neatly lined up on the far wall. "Where is Anya?"

Giles raised his eyebrows. "She left earlier, she had to run some errands to prepare for the wedding."

Willow nodded with a grimace. "That is part of what he is stressing about."

Giles snapped the book shut without even glancing in it as he sat down and folded his hands on top. "Please explain!"

"He suddenly has all these bills and stuff. You know, he had rent from his parents before, but now he has power bills and water bills and garbage bills and all sorts of NEW bills that he is responsible for. He told me the other night that he didn´t realize how much his parents actually paid for before! And he makes good money but, he put her name on his checking account and Anya has been using the credit cards and she spends so much..."

Giles took his glasses off and wiped them. "I´m starting to get the picture."

"There is MORE! He proposed yes, but he wanted sort of a...longer...engagement." Willow said weakly. She looked almost apologetic.

"Ah, Anya on the other hand..." Giles sighed. He rubbed his jaw slowly.

"Yeah, and she has also been discussing...babies." Willow winced. "I don´t think Xander is ready for that kind of talk yet."

Giles stared in disbelief. "I don´t think many men ARE! I mean, he would make a WONDERFUL father I´m sure! But as you said, he is not ready yet, and if he is starting to have financial problems..."

Willow nodded. "And Anya doesn´t want a small, cheap occasion...she wants the full, bells and whistles tah–dah!"

Giles rubbed his head. "Oh dear. In MY youth I would have already left skid marks. I would have run so fast, so far by now!"

Willow shrugged. "So I think he´s just kinda...edging toward his bi–annual flirt with mental breakdown." She managed a weak grin.

Giles tilted his head a little. "I think perhaps we should watch carefully...instead of flirting with it, he might actually manage to dive straight into one."

"Xander? Nah! You know him! He gets close but then he laughs it right off!" Willow smiled. "He´ll bounce back! Just like always!"

Xander sat in the dark looking at the paper in his hand. He could barely see the numbers as light spilled in from the other room, but no matter. They wouldn´t add up correctly in the light any better than they did the near dark. Anya stood in the doorway. "Xander?"

Xander crumpled the paper up and threw it onto the table as Anya flipped on the switch. Xander glared at the piece of paper in front of him.

"Xander, what is wrong?" Anya asked as she stepped into the room. "Are you okay?"

Xander leaned forward with his head in his hands shaking his head.

"Aw, Xander! I´m sorry. I´ll fix it, Giles pays me tomorrow..." She wrapped her arms around him.

"It isn´t enough. I already figured it...it isn´t enough!" He growled. His hand swiped forward, the crumpled paper flew across the room and bounced benignly on the floor.

Anya straightened up. "Look, it is NO reason to get upset!"

"No," Xander began to laugh. "NO? No? No reason to get upset?"

Anya backed up as he started to laugh hysterically.

"No reason to get upset?" Xander stood up suddenly, heedless of his chair flying backward. "No reason to get upset!"

He nodded. "I guess I can see it from your point of view. No big deal. Xander pays the bills, you get pretty things. Yeah, I get that."

Anya reached out for him but he pulled back with a hiss.

"Anya, you are driving me to bankruptcy! I can´t afford that!" He shouted. He gestured helplessly from his bankbook still lying on the table to the room in general. "I can´t afford this place AND your lifestyle!"

Anya flinched. "I´m sorry! But I´ll help pay! We are in this together you know! Your bills are my bills!"

"Of course MY bills are YOUR bills...YOU are the one MAKING THEM!" He roared reaching out and pushing everything else off the desk.

Anya narrowed her eyes. "Oh! Don´t you DARE talk to me like that!"

"Like what!" He continued to yell, waving his hands wildly. "Like someone trying to RUIN ME!"

"LIKE THAT!" She screamed back. "I´m not trying to ruin you! Yeah, I over spent this month..."

"AGAIN!" He picked up the chair lying on the floor and tossed it at the wall breaking a hole into it.

Anya flinched and backed up a step. Xander groaned as he looked at the hole, muttering. "Something else to pay for."

"If you are going to be like this, I´ll just leave!" Anya turned away.

"Oh NO you won´t!" He grabbed her arm and pulled her back into the room.

"Or what? You are going to hit me!" Anya screeched. She raised her hand and slapped him across the face. He let go reflexively and held his cheek. Bright red bloomed across his face leaving a perfect imprint of her hand. And behind his eyes the world flickered out of view.

Anya pulled back and sneered. "Go on! Go on! Hit me! Will it make you feel better?"

He stared at her in shock before he shook his head.

"No." He whispered, still looking at her.

"Go ahead! I bet it would feel real good! HIT ME!" She screamed as she shoved him suddenly.

He allowed himself to be pushed backward and continued to hold his face and stare. "No."

The sound was hollow as he said it again. "No."

She took a deep breath. "I´m going now. Why don´t you just...go get drunk like you have been! Might as well start being dysfunctional NOW!"

Xander shook his head again. "I haven´t been drinking."

She scoffed. "Yeah right. Then where were you last night? Or for that matter, every night this WEEK? Hmmm? You weren´t HERE! I checked! And according to Thomas at the Bronze, you were seen there last night!"

Xander shook his head yet again. "I don´t know what you are talk..."

"Don´t fucking lie to me XANDER! He saw you there! What? You cheating on me or something? Is that it? Is that the real problem here?" Anya shoved him again and he limply fell against the wall.

"No." Xander mumbled.

"Look, Xander WHATEVER! Until you figure out what you want out of...US...I´m out of here! I don´t need this crap...Oprah said so!" Anya turned and slammed the door behind her. A picture on the wall shattered, glass scattered across the floor.

Xander slowly slid down the wall still holding his cheek. "I don´t know where..."

He shook his head slowly and inside he was seeing somewhere else. Another time. A time he didn´t want to remember.

"You FUCKING BITCH!" His father yelled as he slammed his mother into the wall. "It´s YOUR fault he´s here!"

"Dad!"

Xander´s head snapped back as the slap stung his cheek.

Xander shook his head and cleared away the memory. He smiled as he stood up. "Thought the fucking bitch would NEVER leave! I think it is time for her to leave...permanently."

Xander laughed as he grabbed his wallet and keys. "Time to have some fun!"

She sneered as she looked from side to side. No one was worthy of her attention, not for food and not for a quick mate. The music pounded around her as she moved through the crowd. Searching for...someone. Faces she found familiar she avoided. Even when they waved her over she would favor them with a false grin and a tiny shake of her head. She saw the bitch. She turned her back as the other woman called out to her. Weak. Unworthy of a truly powerful pack, and definitely not her type. She could not understand why the Other would want her. She knew that turning her back would be the best way to draw her out. Make her chase.

She suppressed a growl as the creature she could only think of as the Bitch tracked her down and tried to confront her.

"XANDER! How dare you ignore me?" Anya yelled above the music.

"What do you want?"

"I think we should talk...about what happened! I´m sorry!" Anya shouted. "Let´s go somewhere quiet!"

Feral eyes studied Anya. "Perhaps that would be good."

Blood. Blood everywhere! Xander blinked hard as he tried to wake himself. The Park? He was covered in blood. What happened? He pulled himself into a sitting position. What happened? He held his hand up to his face; sticky partially dried blood covered his fingertips. Xander looked around him frantically. Anya?

"Oh, God, NO! ANYA!"

Hours later, Giles gripped Xander´s shoulder tightly. "Did they say anything else?"

Xander shook his head numbly. "No, they just said that I must have been knocked out as the wolves attacked Anya or something and that something must have scared them off."

He dropped his head into his hands and swallowed a sob. "I don´t REMEMBER anything!"

Giles squeezed Xander´s shoulder again. "It is understandable. Traumatic experiences...sometimes the mind closes itself off to hide from the pain."

Xander laid his head completely down on the table as his shoulder began to shake with every silent sob.

"Spike?" Giles turned to the vampire.

Spike shook his head. "Sorry. I really am, I liked her! But nope, nothing! Just that faint animalistic scent from before. I still can´t trace it!"

Giles sighed heavily. "Don´t worry Xander, we will find whatever did this!"

"I, I, I need to go home for a while." Xander swallowed hard as he lifted his head. His eyes were already red and puffy looking. "I need time..."

"Of course!" Giles nodded.

"Maybe I should, go with him. See him to his door?" Spike said suddenly.

"Perhaps you should!" Giles agreed readily.

Spike drove. He was a little surprised that Xander had allowed him to. Even with the waves of misery that came off of Xander he had anticipated a little argument about him driving.

"We WILL find it, you know?" Spike said. He cast a side–glance at the human that was huddled against the door.

Xander didn´t say anything, just nodded.

"It won´t get away with it." Spike nodded himself. Spike was at a loss; he had never had to comfort mourning humans before. Not really. In days gone by, he had caused the mourning. And he was certain that Xander wouldn´t appreciate the type of comfort that he had always given Dru. But he did smile to himself as he imagined it. He could see his hand in Xander´s hair, stroking the silky waves. He glanced in the rearview mirror then turned the corner as he then thought of how good it would feel to run his teeth over that smooth soft skin at the hollow of Xander´s throat...

"Spike? Are you purring?"

Spike sat up straight and nearly pulled them into the opposite lane before he got himself back under control.

"Purring? I don´t purr!" Spike cleared his throat.

"I distinctly heard purring Spike." Xander narrowed his eyes.

"No. Maybe something is wrong with your engine. Should have that looked at." Spike cleared his throat again and suddenly wished he hadn´t run out of cigarettes.

"Riiiiiight." Xander said with a nod. "No purring."

Spike made a study of the road in front of him. He refused to look over at the other man, even though he could feel the stare. He could feel Xander staring at him intently and suddenly he found his other senses tuning into him. Heard the slow steady heartbeat and the slow steady breathing. At least he had calmed down apparently.

Xander smiled at the intent look on Spike´s face.

Idiot! Killing her? Could you have been so dumb? Now the Other is sad! And his energy is down! Meaning that MY energy is DOWN!

A growl seemed to echo in the still night.

STUPID STUPID STUPID! He didn´t need protection from her! They argued! It is normal! The slap was forgivable!

In the distance a long manic Ooooo WHUP sound came in short bursts. Punctuated by growls.

Don´t get aggressive with me. You can´t harm me! And now I´m left to pick up the pieces. As usual! This one has interest already. He WAS purring...

Xander walked slowly to his apartment with Spike walking close behind. As he got to the door, he turned and looked down at Spike. "I really appreciate you bringing me home, I don´t think I could have driven. Thank you!"

Spike blinked up at Xander rapidly. "Uh, er...no problem!"

"It is getting close to dawn, isn´t it? Perhaps you should stay? The couch is a lot more comfortable than the one that used to be in the basement..."

"Umm..." Spike searched his numb brain for something to say. It was rare that anyone thanked him for anything and he wasn´t used to responding in kind.

"Please stay! It is the least I can do." Xander opened the door and held it. "You are welcome in my home."

Spike opened and closed his mouth a couple of times.

"I have satellite television."

"Thank you, I accept your gracious invitation!" Spike ducked into the apartment missing the leering smile on Xander´s face.

As Spike settled down on the couch, Xander handed him the controls to the box and television. His fingers lingered on Spike´s for a second longer than necessary. Xander smiled at him sadly. "If you need anything, just ask."

Xander lowered his head a picture of perfect misery. Spike nodded. "I´ll do that, you just get some rest."

Xander nodded and walked dejectedly toward his room, smiling when he was turned away from the vampire. Xander could smell the arousal from clear across the room, but in a sad voice he said. "I will, see you tonight?"

"Yes..." Spike answered quietly.

Xander shut the door to his room and softly laughed. "He is so easy! And Angeleus thought WE had a white knight complex?"

Xander removed his heavy work boots and stretched. "Don´t worry, I´ll take care of everything."

Spike flipped through the menu guide. "All these bloody channels and not a bleedin´ thing on!"

He sighed as he settled on BBC America. Saffy was just to the part where she was helping Patsy with the ´tit´ test when he felt his eyes getting heavy. He took in an unnecessary breath as he felt them start to close. Exhaling slowly, he drifted off completely.

Saffy had removed Patsy´s bra and had leaned in to take the sagging breast into her mouth. Spike leaned against the wall and cheered. "Go for it Saf! Do you some bloody good!"

Patsy smirked at him as Saf laved her eagerly. "Little chit is good for something, ay?"

Spike nodded in agreement. "Got a fag, Pats?"

"My coat pocket next to you!" Patsy grinned as Saffy went lower and started to unzip her pants. Spike turned and saw the jacket. He hadn´t noticed the dresser there before. He shrugged as he pulled the pack out. When he turned back only Patsy stood there.

"What happened to the little chit?" Spike asked.

"She had to leave." Patsy smirked as she made her way to him slowly. She wrapped an arm around his waist. "If I told you that you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?"

"Wrong episode Pats." Spike murmured pulling back a little.

"No big." She dipped her head forward and nuzzled his neck.

He tried to back away. "No offense, but I didn´t mind watching but you just don´t get Little Spike´s attention."

He turned away to try and find the door handle.

"Would this be better?" He heard a younger voice inquire.

"Cicely?"

"Yes, my dear man! I heard that you had great affection for me. I´m so sorry I never returned it. Please allow me to make it up to you," the young lady said very properly, despite her startlingly lack of attire. Not even a pair of bloody bloomers!

"Um, I don´t think..." Spike turned away and tried to grasp the door handle.

"Or would this be better?"

He turned back and Saffy was standing before him, naked to the waist and smiling. "Er, not really, like them a little older actually." He pulled hard on the door, cursing beneath his non–existent breath when it would not open.

She pouted and bent forward at the waist and flipped her suddenly floppy hair up as she stood back up straight. Dark eyes stared at him under dark hair. She smiled and walked forward. "Did you miss me Spikey?"

"Dru?" He reached forward as she wrapped her arms around him.

"I missed you SO much Spikey!" She pet his hair lovingly. "I should NEVER have left you! Can you EVER forgive me?"

Spike touched her face gently then felt himself backing up. "No, this isn´t right. Something is off here!"

Drusilla pouted. "Not enough off if you ask me!"

She began to pull at his clothes.

"Your accent, the way you speak! It isn´t right! You AREN´T Drusilla!" Spike pulled away and ducked under her outstretched arms.

"Of course I am silly!" She tsked at him.

He shook his head.

"I´m anyone you want me to be!" She moved toward him slowly, like an animal trainer with a wild creature. She shook her head and blonde hair fell to her shoulders.

"Buffy?"

"If you want, if it makes you happy!" She smiled.

"You´re dead!"

"So are you, hasn´t slowed you down any!" She laughed.

"Are you a ghost?" He asked in a whisper.

"No, do you want me to be?" She asked turning translucent. "I am whatever your heart desires!"

He sat down on what had started out as Saffy´s bed but had now turned into his mat in his crypt. He looked around confused. "Where are we?"

"Home. Where you feel safe." She stroked his face gently, once more solid. "Let me love you Spike!"

He shook his head. "I don´t know what you are..."

"I am whatever you want. Whatever makes you happy. Whatever makes you feel good!" She reached out and stroked him through his jeans.

"Buffy, or whoever you are..." He started as he grabbed her hand pushing it away.

She smiled at him, "Does this form not please you? How about this one?"

Her face morphed and he found himself looking up into dark eyes once more. Short hair and a dark smile. "Glad to see me?"

"Angel? Or Angeleus?" Spike squeaked as the man in front of him grabbed his crotch. The well–defined abs, the strong muscular arms, everything that Spike could remember, all for the taking.

Angel smiled mysteriously. "That´s for me to know and you to...find...out!"

Angel pushed him down upon the bed that was suddenly softer than it should have been. "You´ve been a bad boy, Spike!"

Ripping off Spike´s shirt he cast it aside as he straddled Spike´s chest. "Very bad!"

Spike grasped Angel´s hips. "You are crushing me!"

Angel captured Spike´s lips in a searing kiss. Spike growled as he tried to push Angel off. "GET OFF!"

Angel chuckled, "Don´t mind if I do!"

He rubbed up against Spike eliciting a moan from deep in side Spike´s throat. "No, get off of me!" Spike managed to roll out from under the other vampire.

"Who do you want Spike?" Angel asked reaching for him. "You have to be sure. You have to choose!"

Spike turned away toward the door. "Look I don´t know what you are but..."

"But..." The voice changed again and Spike was forced to look back.

Xander stood in front of Spike, completely clothed looking as he had before leaving Spike to his television. The young man walked slowly toward him. "But?"

"Are you real?" Spike asked.

Xander nodded. "I´m as real as you want me to be. But you have to choose. Do you want me?"

Spike shook his head. "No."

"I think you are lying." Xander said as he stroked Spike´s jaw with a finger. Spike leaned unconsciously into the touch. "I know you are lying. You want me, even if you don´t admit it."

Spike shook his head again as Xander smiled. "Does it matter really? This is a dream. Only a dream. You can take what you want here!"

Spike looked at Xander carefully as Xander pulled him closer. "You rejected the others outright, refused their touch. Everyone you´ve ever shown the slightest interest. You haven´t refused mine."

Xander bent forward and carefully kissed Spike. "You´re very beautiful."

Spike fell into the kiss wrapping his arms tightly around Xander´s neck. He pulled up suddenly. "This is just a dream?"

"Just a dream, baby." Xander murmured as he leaned back in. With a free hand he began to slowly unbutton Spike´s pants. "Just a dream, and I´m gonna make you feel real good!"

Xander nibbled his way down Spike´s throat teasing the skin with his teeth.

Spike gasped for breath. "Help! I feel like I´m being strangled."

Xander smiled against the cool skin. "Shhh, it is okay! You don´t have to breathe!"

Spike struggled against Xander. "Too much pressure."

Xander continued making hushing noises as he stroked Spike´s hair and held him tightly around the waist. "Is that better?"

Spike began to calm down. "What is happening?"

"Nothing that will hurt you." Xander licked the soft skin under Spike´s ear. "Better now?"

"Still feel like someone´s got me around the throat." Spike´s voice quavered. "I don´t like this!"

"Don´t be scared."

"I´m NOT scared!" Spike growled, his eyes flickered to a startling yellow. Fangs descended and his face became ridged. But he still couldn´t move from Xander´s grasp.

Xander smiled. "You will be okay, I won´t hurt you. I won´t let you be hurt! Well, not unless you want to be."

Spike struggled harder in his grasp.

"Don´t fight me, baby!" Xander pushed him against a wall. Spike tried to twist to look behind him but found himself unable to move. The bed had disappeared.

"This is a dream." Spike told himself. "Then I should be able to control it!"

Xander shook his head. "No, it don´t work that way here, or maybe it does and this is what you really want."

Spike tried to push Xander away only to find that his hands were shackled to the wall. Xander kissed him gently on the head. "It will be fine!"

"What is wrong with my throat? What is on my chest?" Spike looked down and could not see anything, and just where had his shirt gone again?

"It doesn´t matter." Xander mumbled as he brushed his lips against Spike´s. "It doesn´t matter at all."

Spike felt his eyes begin to close as Xander pushed against him driving his tongue deeper into his mouth. The warmth invaded him, warmed him from the inside out. He moaned as Xander began to rub against him in an intoxicating rhythm. Xander´s fingers raked down Spike´s ribs eliciting a sharp breath.

Xander stepped back. "Angel was wrong. You´ve been a very GOOD boy! And you deserve a reward!"

Spike blinked as the lights first went out then came back, dimmer than before. "A very good boy!" Xander said again.

The knife in Xander´s hand glittered in the half–light. He twisted it from side to side letting the vampire see the blade. "Beautiful, isn´t it?"

Spike nodded.

"Very sharp." Xander brought it to Spike´s face letting him see the edge. His voice was even and measured. Calm, as though he were discussing the most boring topic in the world. "It can cut with surgical precision."

Spike looked away from the knife into Xander´s eyes. "What are you going to do?"

Xander kissed him on the forehead once more. "Watch, little vampire."

Xander stood before Spike completely naked. When had that happened? Oh, a dream, that´s right! Spike thought madly as Xander brought the knife to bear on his arm.

"Blood is so much more than it seems." Xander said in the same tone. "It is life and death. It is oath and promise. It is binding. It binds you to me and I to you."

Carefully, with just the point of the dagger, he traced his veins. "For me to lose too much means my death but for you it means your life. I become a part of you, I become more in that moment."

With a flick of his wrist, a small bead of blood welled up. "You and I become one!"

Spike watched mesmerized as the small drop of blood dripped along Xander´s skin. Xander held his wrist up and allowed it to flow, twisting and turning, as the small drop became a brilliant line against his skin. "A small sip of your blood to the dying and they are granted eternity but it is through mine that you are allowed to keep that eternity."

Xander traced the crimson line with the tip of the blade. "It´s warm. It is like silk, it smells like forever!"

Spike felt his fangs descend as Xander came closer, holding his bleeding wrist up just out of reach. "You would feed from me, kill me and in that single moment, love me, if for no other reason than I granted you life for that one moment."

Xander pulled away leaving Spike growling in frustration. "But would you appreciate me after?"

"Does any vampire appreciate his victims?" Xander asked. "I think not. The moment is gone too soon!"

Xander brought the knife to his neck. "The knife is so sharp Spike, it barely needs to be pressed to split my flesh. The pain is sharp and clear and feels so good!"

Spike swallowed hard as Xander ran the knife down his chest leaving a small trail of blood behind it. "I sometimes wonder what it would be like to be turned. But then I would have to give up this... I couldn´t give it to you anymore. I often wonder if I could even BE turned, to tell the truth."

Spike pulled against his restraints hard, rattling the chains above him, growling as he strained. Xander came closer, still just out of reach. "It smells good, doesn´t it? It would feel so good, wouldn´t it? To feel it slide over your tongue? To bite me and drain me?"

Spike groaned in frustration.

"But you can´t bite! That little bit of wire in your head makes it impossible." Xander smirked. "Mores the pity!"

The wounds upon Xander´s body bleed freely pooling at his feet. "But you could love me, sip from what I have offered. Take joy in it and allow me to love you. You want someone to love you Spike."

Spike froze in place as Xander finally touched him. "You crave it almost as much as blood."

Xander´s soft voice spoke into Spike´s ear. "You want warmth, you want life, you want ME!"

Spike leaned into the other man as suddenly his hands were free and Xander was wrapping himself around him. He felt the slick blood smear against his skin and he greedily lapped at it. Xander gasped and moaned as Spike forced his tongue into the thin slit left by the blade. "Oh yeah!"

Spike ignored the tightening in his chest and the pressure on his throat as Xander´s hand wandered down and grasped his erection tightly pumping it in time with his licking of his tongue. Xander felt the smooth skin as he pulled at the hard length. Felt the foreskin move under his fingers, natural on an unnatural being. Spike began to move, thrusting into Xander´s hand faster and faster, frantically digging into the shallow cuts trying to capture every drop, his golden eyes dull and lust filled. Xander used his free hand to hold Spike´s head tightly against his collarbone as he tipped his head to the side. Xander pushed against the sharp fangs until he could feel the sharp tingle that seemed to hum. His eyes became half lidded as he rubbed himself against, Spike feeling his own erection dig into Spike. "Come on, baby, take from me, as I take from you!"

Spike growled low in his throat as he felt a new gush of blood flow over his tongue. He grabbed Xander´s hair in his fist and pulled the boy´s head back farther while his other hand held Xander tightly at the waist. Xander tightened his hold on the straining cock, pumping faster as Spike´s teeth grazed his skin, beginning to rake it, widening the cut. Xander suddenly yanked Spike away from the cut and kissed him deeply, heedless of the sharp fangs, impaling his tongue on them swirling his blood around the vampire´s cold mouth. Moaning as he pressed Spike back up against the wall, digging his fingers into the pale flesh under him. Spike kissed him frantically trying to drain him simply from the kiss alone as he thrust into Xander´s hand. He came abruptly with a start as he suddenly felt the intrusion inside him and realized that Xander had moved his hand from his hip to his backside. As the spurts died down, Xander pressed him even tighter against him rubbing Spike´s cum between them. Cum and blood mixed together in a heady combination. Xander picked Spike up easily and laid him upon the bed. Saffron´s bed, as Spike blinked at the room. He was back where he had started only alone. He closed his eyes and fell away from himself to continue his sleep, dreamlessly.

On the couch Xander removed his hands from Spike´s throat and stood up from where he had been straddling Spike´s chest. His clothes felt uncomfortable and tight but he smiled as he leaned down to pick up the remote controls that had fallen to the floor. He turned the television off with a push of a button and smiled in the near darkness. His eyes glowed softly, illuminating the vampire. They crackled with energy and he blinked rapidly to dissipate the glow for fear of waking the other creature.

Xander bent at the waist and kissed the vampire on the forehead. "Thanks babe! I needed that!"

Spike turned over in his sleep and Xander chuckled to himself as he returned to the bedroom. "Vampires are so easy."

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